Apologies for the late post. Family issues arose the other night whilst I was in the midst of writing this blog. So, I had to save and finish it today.
Monday's question from Dianna is both fab and amusing: What would be your ideal "real life" first date and how would that compare to the first date in one of your romance novels? Pros and cons of each?
Fab because it is an interesting question, but amusing because none of the characters I have actually written have had first dates; at least, not in the sense that one character has asked out another. They have either met on nights out, or known each other for a while and inevitably one thing leads to another and, well, I write erotic romances so I'm sure you can guess ;-P So, this is going to be an interesting question to answer.
No matter how well you know the guy - or girl - you're bound to be nervous on your first date, right? It's only naturally, which is why it doesn't surprise me that a lot of people now-a-days try to keep dates casual; meet up for coffee, or go to a wine bar in the afternoon etc. keeping it casual kinda takes the edge off a little. I mean, no matter what you will take your time getting ready because you want to look nice and go about the usual process of making an effort, but - and I don't know about you - I find going to a restaurant for a first date adds a little more pressure; you have to act a certain way - meaninglessly on your best behaviour, though I'm sure a lot of people don't - and your kinda on display a lot more. Anyone else feel that way? I think restaurants are something to enjoy when you are a couple and our comfortable with one another.
Personally - and now to actually answer the question - my ideal first date would have to be casual but fun, an activity of sorts so you're both not sat starring at each other in case the conversation dies. My ideal date would be going to a fun fair - day or night, or all the way through. Why a fun fair? Because who doesn't like fun fairs? There's all types of rides to go on, and booths - hook a duck, anyone? - to go to. There's fair food and snacks; fresh doughnuts, yum! A fair entitles you to be a little silly, laugh at yourself and your date - if they have a sense of humour - you can talk about anything over a cup of coffee and doughnuts as you watch people screaming as they are thrown around in the air. The pressure is completely off, and if it turns out that you aren't interested in seeing each other again, well, at least you had a fun day out.
How would that date compare to one of my characters . . . well, there would be no sex. What? I'm not that type of girl. It would take more than a bag of candy floss and a go on the waltzers to get me in to bed.
A lot of my characters end up in bed, or against a sofa or wall, on their first "meeting." Mainly because a lot of my characters are very sexually active or are willing to let their hair down for a night, or in some characters cases they have been interested in one another for a while.
Pros of the ideal real date: I, personally, would feel at ease. I wouldn't have to dress up in killer heals that I would no doubt break my neck in or be worried that I would look too slutty. I could dress nice/sexy/casual, because let's face it we're dressed in casual clothing most of the time and if you look good on a day to day basis and your date thinks so then you're off to a great start. I would have fun no matter what the outcome of the date would be.
Cons of the ideal date: Possibility of being sick? I've never been sick at a funfair, but there's a first time for everything. Your date might hate heights, or fun fairs, or get sick easily.
Pros of character "date": Sexy fun. They get laid, because let's face it that is often very fun. And for the characters who have been interested in each other for a while, it would be a fantasy come true.
Cons of character "date": Jump in to bed with someone - as in real life - possibility of feeling like shit after ward. If you ended up dating would you constantly be question if they were really in to you? You might wish you would have taken time to get to know one another instead of opening yourself up in such a vulnerable way before really knowing if you could trust the other person.
There the pros and cons that come to the top of my head, but what do you think; is there anything you would add to them? Also, what's your ideal date, or the best date you have ever read about?